There were 13 of us on this ride (14 if you include Mike Wood from Carmarthen who made his own way to the lunch stop). I don't want to appear conceited but I think the superb attendance was probably due to the email I sent out prior to this ride tempting everyone with the prospect of having lunch by the pool at Leekes under the shade of spreading palm trees, dusky Cross Hands maidens attending to our every need. The whole lunchtime interval was to be rounded off with some quick pina coladas before tearing ourselves away to cycle past the sun-drenched Llanelli beaches, through beautiful Bynea and then home. And why shouldn't they have believed me, after all they believe everything I write on these pages!

The first thing that happened, and for John's sake lets get it over with quickly, is that Mr Cardy turns up at Killay in his car with his bike in the boot. This is not his usual habit and I hoped that he had brought a note from Marilyn excusing him from the 10 mile ride from Baglan. His excuse was that he had woken up to a puncture and I'm afraid I had no option but to accept it. Soon we were joined by Des and Tom, Chris and Ken so we made our way to Gowerton where we were to meet the others, by the time we set off from there we were 13 strong. Included in the 13 was the dapper Bob Smith who had graced us with his presence last week too. I asked him how his knee was and he said it was fine now, he just has to work on the rest of his body. Yes, he's probably right.

In a straight line we rode through Pontarddulais, turning heads as we went. A very fine body of men (apart from Chris, of course, she is not a man). Des was leading but went straight on after the bridge, we intended to go left so I shouted "Left, Des!" Chris shouted "Right, Des!" You see, Chris finds directions confusing. Quite rightly Des found our directions confusing but was soon back in the fold, next time it might just be easier to shout "Wrong way!"

We start the long, two mile climb out of Pontarddulais and the wind is strong in our faces, I think "Aren't I glad that I am not suffering this gale on my own." But then I realise that I am doing just that, under normal circumstances I would gradually be overtaken by most of the others but not today. They cycled comfortably in my slipstream until we rounded a corner and the wind dropped, it was then that they overtook then cycled away without even a thought for me. Life is so terribly cruel! (By the way Marilyn, John, allegedly my friend, definately your husband, passed me with a rather satisfied grin. Can you have a sharp word with him please!) The final hill to the T-junction at Llanon is not a long hill by any means, it can be described as short and sharp but every time we reach the other side of the road we just have to stop for a rest, the house directly opposite has a Tarmaced front and that is where we always congregate and discuss where we will stop for lunch, we agree to differ each time and always go our separate ways for lunch - big principles are at stake here!

Anyway I digress. A car stops at the top of the hill opposite and a young lady comes out and walks towards us, perhaps she is lost and is trying to get home. That was partly true - she was not lost but she was certainly trying to get home and we were spread out in front of her house!

We take a right turn and eventually find ourselves going down the hill past the converted chapel. This hill is steep, the surface is poor and there is loose gravel in places so its a bit hairy. But hey! Put that in the past tense because the council has done quite a good job of patching up. My brake blocks are still red hot on reaching the bottom though.

Eight of us lunch at Leekes but sadly the swimming pool had been sold the previous day and the potted palms had gone to the same buyer. The dusky Cross Hands maidens were all off on maternity leave. Honest!! A group of cyclists pretending to be us had rushed in half an hour before and polished off the pina coladas before weaving drunkenly off towards Llandeilo. Again honest!!

We were to regroup at the cycle shop at 1.30 and we would have just had time had it not been that Martin's back tyre developed a puncture, I think it would perhaps be stretching it a bit to suggest that this is a strike by the Cross Hands Snipers because they have been strangely quiet since they heard of how we despatched the Talley Snipers on the 6th June. No, I think Martin had been given a bung by the owner of the cycle shop so that the others had more time to fill the till.

That's only my opinion, of course.

The ride back from here was easy, we picked up the cycle track and apart from a little bit of roadway through Tumble it was traffic free all the way to Llanelli and beyond.

Great day!!

And finally.

Recently I became sufficiently worked up about a favourite subject of mine to send a letter to The Times. Sadly they did not choose to publish it, the trouble is that some things really need to be said so, I'm afraid, you are being lumbered with it.

Sir

I have noticed recently the increasing trend of HGV's carrying unnecessary apostrophe's.

Whilst this may be totally insignificant in the case of a single vehicle, when one considers the number of these constantly trundling up and down our motorway's then clearly this extra weight can only add to the problems of global warming.

On also taking into account that many of these vehicles are laden with potatoe's and tomatoe's all complete with their own unnecessary apostrophe's it can be little wonder that we have had so many flood's and gale's.

R G Evan's

This letter prompted a reply from 'Complacent of Cardiff'

Dear 'Concerned of Swansea'

Whilst appreciating your concern for the environment vi's-a-vi's superfluous apostrophe's, I believe you have missed an important point. If we were to take these apostrophe's off our road's what could we do with them? Should we clog up our landfill site's or should we incinerate? Either option would cause the 'Dustbin Gestapo' to become apoplectic and steam at the ears thereby compounding the problem of global warming and their response would inevitably be to punish us by increasing council tax thereby forcing everyone to work harder to pay their council tax bill - this in itself would generate more heat and contribute to global warming and hence further flooding.

I therefore contend that we should leave the apostrophe's to trundle around the ether of the motorway system for ever. My response is based upon the principle of 'If we ignore a problem then it doesn't exist' - something to do with tree's falling down in a forest when there is no-one there to hear them fall. But now I digres's into the realm's of deforestation.

There is one further point I would like to make. If you allow yourself to become agitated about this matter then you will generate too much heat and therefore increase your carbon footprint. I therefore suggest that you take a deep breath - on second thoughts this may result in you taking more than your fair share of global oxygen, remember the rainforest's! So just keep cool and remember that the problem of superfluous apostrophe's is the product of an elitist system that denied the benefits of a classical education (like what we got) to the vast majority. We must therefore be tolerant of the ignorant masse's and allow them their apostrophe's if it keep's them happy and contented.

Yours
Complacent of Cardiff

To make matters much worse I was travelling home through Leominster last Monday and came across a sign that said "Light vehicle's diversion". Is there any hope? And what if this spreads to shoe's? Now that really would be a carbon footprint!

Happy pedalling

Lew Spokes

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The Stragglers		Just how many is that, Trev?
Peace (and that's what Big Trev was indicating!)		Bob Smith bathes his face in sunshine
Many thanks to Martin otherwise there would have been no photos!